understanding ourselves, or others?

We always ask about EQ, but do we know what it really is? How do we measure it and to what extent is it about understanding ourselves or knowing how to react to situations with others? When people fall out, they say they have low EQ but is it necessarily true?

They say you have to start to have a strong bond with your inner self, but surely its not all about ourselves right? How can we define such things like emotions and how well we can understand it when they differ from person to person?

I'm really interested to know how high my EQ is, and how they can break it down. Since I'm a little hard pressed for time I shan't blog about it, but googling some of it might be quite interesting :)



During dinner, I told my mom some things about my friends (I usually don't) and how I'm pretty worried from my A's and asked her what my dad and her used to talk about. After that, I came to a conclusion that (there might be more):

We have friends who don't talk to us for weeks/months/years but when we meet up, there'll be loads to say.
We have friends who drift away from us if we don't talk even though we used to.

We have friends whom we talk to everyday and have lots to say to (so we grow closer).

We have friends whom we talk to everyday but they're conversations on surface level so we aren't close.
We have friends whom we talk to everyday but even though the conversations don't hold much, we still feel close to each other.

We have friends we don't talk much to but we still feel close, anyway.

We have friends whom we wave to everyday but that's all there is to it.



Why then, should I think so much about others not talking to me when I jolly well know we'll have loads to say when we're not busy anyway? It wasn't like that before, so am I just comforting myself? The truth is so glaringly obvious yet I can't help it.

For the first time ever, I feel like I'm not the one in control. Its not as bad as it sounds, its just that I unknowingly choose who to talk more to and who not to, and I wonder how people might feel about it.

The thing is, we're all in control of our lives, then why was I able to do that all these years until today? Because I don't dare to in case the other party's able to read through me? Since when did I not want them to? Or I want to, just that I know that I can't?